Have you ever seen posts on social networks where someone will say to all of her friends indiscriminately "I love you all!" or something to that effect? Well, if the Beatles were right, that all you need is love, then the more love we have in our lives, the happier we should be. But how do we bring more love into our lives? Are there "right" ways vs. "wrong" ways and, if so, how do we know the difference? Ayn Rand wrote in her famous novel Atlas Shrugged: "A morality that professes the belief that the values of the spirit are more precious than matter, a morality that teaches you to scorn a whore who gives her body indiscriminately to all men - the same morality demands that you surrender your soul in promiscuous love for all comers." If we loosen our standards on who or what brings us love, will we have more capacity and opportunities for love? If we just love more people, will we be happier? What are the ramifications of having low standards for love?
FTA:
We are told constantly that we must "love" everyone. Leaders of movements declare that they "love" followers they have never met. Enthusiasts of personal-growth workshops and encounter-group weekends emerge from such experiences announcing that they "love" all people everywhere.
Just as a currency, in the process of becoming more and more inflated, has less and less purchasing power, so words, through an analogous process of inflation, through being used less and less discriminately, are progressively emptied of meaning.
It is possible to feel benevolence and goodwill toward human beings one does not know or does not know very well. It is not possible to feel love. Aristotle made this observation twenty-five hundred years ago, and we still need to remember it. In forgetting it, all we accomplish is the destruction of the concept of love.
Love by its very nature entails a process of selection, of discrimination. Love is our response to what represents our highest values. Love is a response to distinctive characteristics possessed by some beings but not by all. Otherwise, what would be the tribute of love?
If love between adults does not imply admiration, if it does not imply an appreciation of traits and qualities that the recipient of love possesses, what meaning or significance would love have and why would anyone consider it desirable?
...Of course, there are other kinds of love besides romantic love. What I feel for my grandchildren is a different kind of love. What it has in common with romantic love, however, is that I see in my grandchildren values and traits that touch my heart. But it would be a corruption of language to say that I "love" my grandchildren the same as I "love" children whom I do not even know. Whatever my feelings for other children, the experience is entirely different...
You ask, "How do I bring love into my life?" My answer is that I focus day after day principally on what I care most about in this world - on what I most respect and admire. That is what I give my time and attention to.
DISCUSS!
Original posting by Braincrave Second Life staff on Feb 14, 2011 at http://www.braincrave.com/viewblog.php?id=467
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Sep, 2017 update: Although Braincrave resulted in two confirmed marriages, the venture didn't meet financial targets. Rather than updating our outdated code base, we've removed all previous dating profiles and retained the articles that continue to generate interest. Moving to valME.io's platform supports dating profiles (which you are welcome to post) but won't allow typical date-matching functionality (e.g., location proximity, attribute similarity).
The Braincrave.com discussion group on Second Life was a twice-daily intellectual group discussions typically held at 12:00 PM SLT (PST) and 7:00 PM SLT. The discussions took place in Second Life group chat but are no longer formally scheduled or managed. The daily articles were used to encourage the discussions.